Oh, Bruce was a real shutterbug. The only thing he was more devoted to than that camera was his family. Holidays, business trips, at the park with the kids, or just a normal day around the house: my Bruce was always snapping away. It was like being married to a Japanese tourist. I wish I had a nickel for every nickel he spent at the Fotomat – and even then he never managed to get all of this film developed. But now I can scan it with the VuPoint Film & Slide Digital Converter.

With images of up to 5 megapixels, our old memories spring into vivid life thanks to the automatic color balance and exposure. The included Arcsoft Photoimpression 6 software makes it easy to enhance and edit these photos, even for somebody like me who’s not too good with the Photoshop. Wherever you are, Bruce, I’m remembering you tonight.

So many good times. So many wonderful memories, so close to my heart. Oooh, here’s a roll from Bruce’s trip to the 1975 Central States Heating & Cooling Installers Association Convention in Duluth. I’ve never even seen these pictures. Let’s just scan these in, and…hmmm, it must be mislabeled. This is Bruce playing with the kids – no, no, wait, that’s a little boy and we don’t have any sons. Must be a nephew or something. That was my Bruce, always so good with children. Oh, look, wedding photos! What a nice surpr- wait. Wait a minute. This isn’t me.

That’s Bruce, but that woman is not me.

Who the hell is she? Who is this woman, Bruce? What are you doing with your arm around her? Why are you opening Christmas presents with these people? Who’s the little boy tottering on the brand-new Huffy? I should’ve known nobody would be making “sales trips” on Christmas. He said it was the best time to sell to his Buddhist clients. What an idiot I must’ve been! My beloved husband, living a double life all those years! And me, too stupid to know it! But now I know it all! Every bitter detail in living color, now that it’s too late to matter! Oh, yes, I know everything now, thanks to the VuPoint Film & Slide Digital Converter! Damn you for destroying my illusions, VuPoint Film & Slide Digital Converter! Damn you for ruining 40 years of beautiful memories! Damn you!

Warranty: 1 Year VuPoint

Features:

• Convert 35mm slides and negatives to digital files
• Convert up to 5.0 mega pixel quality images
• Automatic color balance and exposure
• Convert color or monochrome negatives
• No additional power source needed, used USB 2.0 port for data and power

Specifications:

• Image Sensor: 5 Mega pixels CMOS sensor
• Frame Rate (Max): 5 Mega pixels (2592×1944) 2 fps, SXGA (1280×960) 15 fps
• Lens: Fno=2.0, Half-field angle = 15°, 4 glass elements
• Focus Range: Fixed Focus
• Exposure Control: Automatic
• Color Balance: Automatic
• Scan high resolution: 5 Mega pixels equals to 1829 dpi enhanced 3600 dpi
• Interface: USB 2.0
• Data conversion: 10 bits per color channel
• Scan method: Single pass
• Light source: Back light (3 white LED)
• Power: USB port
• Dimension (LxHxW): 3.5” x 6.5” x 3.5”
• Weight: 16 oz.
• System Requirements: Windows XP

In the box:

• VuPoint FSC1VPBX2 Film & Digital Slide Converter
• 35mm Film Strip
• Mounted Slide Tray
• Cleaning Brush
• Software CD

Ever since ancient times, humankind has struggled to create a handheld drink mixer that would give us mastery of the cosmic secrets of Powered Mixology. Many brave mixolognauts have given their lives in this struggle. But now, finally, the secret is revealed. With a 9000 rpm motor, the Vortex Portable Mixing Glass is our last, best hope for victory over those ridiculous probing aliens.

That’s right, the aliens. That’s what they’re here for. Those abductions and probes have all been to keep us afraid, to keep us down, to keep us from finally inventing a way to mix powdered lemonade or chocolate milk or even protein shakes without even using a blender. But guess what, aliens? It didn’t work. It didn’t work beyond your wildest dreams. Because the Vortex is not just for drinks. The Vortex can also mix up eggs, marinades, instant pudding, even cocktails! This ultra portable 18 ounce mixing glass is easy to transport and fun to use, and you’ll be getting two of them, letting you double fist your mixing. And, of course, you’ll also be defeating aliens each and every time your Vortex whips you up a drink.

That’s because each Vortex Portable Mixing Glass is powered by a stable wormhole tunnel that connects directly to the central power control located in the center of the Montauk Project’s headquarters deep under the surface of 18th Century Mars. If you’re ever there, just take a left at the giant marble horse statue and go down the hall. It’s the door on the right. If you see the timelocked USS Eldridge you’ve gone too far. And naturally, you’ll need two AA batteries to trigger this wormhole tunnel and get your Vortex Portable Mixing Glass in contact with central power. But the first two AA batteries are included, just to get you started off right. Think of it as our way of putting Earth first.

Those aliens would do anything to get their hands on this Vortex technology. Be careful. We’re willing to give all humans a two pack of Vortex Portable Mixing Glasses because we know we can trust our own. But once you have them, protect them at any cost! Because right now, around Alpha Centauri, there’s a Grey who wants to make chocolate milk and then breed. And he doesn’t want to use a spoon. He wants to use a Vortex Portable Mixing Glass and your wife or daughter.

Be strong, fellow humans! Vortex for victory!

Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty

Features:

• 18 ounce mug with 9000 rpm motor creates a vortex at a push of a button and mixes your drink
• Completely blends any type of powder instantly, won’t leave clumps of powder
• Easy to clean, add water and a drop of soap into Vortex and turn it on and within 30 seconds it will be clean
• Great for making Energy Drinks, Baby Formula, Cocktails, Eggs, Marinades, Jello, Juices, or mixing cream and sugar for Coffee
• Leak proof lid
• 2 1/2” diameter base, fits in most car cup holders
• Glass height without the lid is 6 3/4”
• Glass height with lid is 7 3/4”
• Made out of durable stainless steel and acrylic
• BPA free
• Operates on 2 AAA batteries (Included)

Additional Photos:

• Vortex 18oz. Portable Mixing Glass
• Leak Proof Lid
• Vortex Portable Mixing Glass in Action

In the box:

• 2 Vortex 18oz. Portable Mixing Glasses
• 2 Acrylic Lids
• 4 AAA Batteries